Confessions of a Flower Remedy Producer

I need help. We all need help but mine is very specific. Every time I get Borage flower remedy out the box, and it gets used a lot 'cus it's very useful, I think of ukip Nigel Farage's smug face. It's really annoying and may even be a bit creepy. I thought of taking some White Chestnut in the hope of curing me of this half rhyme affliction, however after more thought I realised I would just be infecting this most beautiful of remedies with this irritating thought!

Down at the pub I talked to others about my problem with our next prime minister but they just shook their heads: they didn't understand. Then I confessed in the social media and received lots of supportive messages and advice. Amongst them was this from a fellow alternative practitioner. "Your borage-Farage dilemma piqued my curiosity, so I looked at Mr Fs date of birth to see his underlying energy signature. Confidentially speaking at a cursory glance , no 2-5-8 so the circle of hypersensitivity prevails, with a strong divide between physical and mental planes; his emotional responses are likely to be off centre and he will tend to lack in sensitivity towards others and be low in empathy. Unable to express inner feelings (1), but a capable if somewhat suspicious planner (3), who is very materially oriented (4,4).

"Borage could help balance his deficit in a variety of ways, and I have been inspired by this to suggest it to another (very different) person with the same missing numbers. Thanks to you."

So this got me thinking, late one night, brandy bottle drained, what if this Farage guy is really a fairy, channelling himself through Borage? It makes sense because during the making of a flower essence he enters my thoughts at that point dedicated to the fairies, the time they enter the remedies.

"Watch your dreams", that's what I say: plenty gets released through the subconscious when you take flower remedies. That night my dreams turned into a strangely erotic nightmare when Nigel Farage with his 'I'm definitely 100% not homosexual' hair cut walked into our local wearing a pink tutu. Dear Nigel, keep up the good work. I won't be voting for you but I've now resigned myself to having a thought of you in my bottle of borage flower essence.

nigel farageborage

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